Find Your Middle
Have you ever found yourself navigating a period of transition, caught between the person you once were and the one you're becoming? I've certainly experienced the challenge of balancing two extremes in my life. I wouldn't label myself as naive, but I admit that as I heal and let my guard down, I've become less vigilant in how I allow people to treat me. I'm not suggesting that I walk around blindly trusting everyone, but I've found myself giving everyone the benefit of the doubt, even when they may not deserve it.
In the past, I was exceptionally guarded, never fully trusting anyone and constantly suspecting hidden motives. Back then, I believed I was protecting myself, but I later realized that I was inadvertently restricting myself and my relationships in the name of self-preservation. As I learn to trust myself more, I've noticed a significant shift in my behavior. I'm not as defensive, and I'm quicker to allow people into my life than I used to be. I've spent considerable time reflecting on this, as I want to avoid regressing to my old ways, but I also don't want to be taken advantage of.
Recently, during a therapy session, I found myself discussing this very issue with my therapist. It dawned on me that there's a recurring theme in my life: the quest to find my middle ground. This theme doesn't just apply to my relationships; it's also relevant in my business and financial decisions. Striking that balance where I can protect myself while fostering meaningful connections is crucial to my personal growth. Advocating for myself in business and expressing my emotions in my personal relationships has been a challenging journey for me, but I recognize that doing so in a mature and respectful manner is an ongoing practice.
Ultimately, no one else can dictate what's too much or too far for you personally. You hold the key to all your answers. For me, easing the pressure and allowing myself to navigate my emotions has been immensely helpful. Instead of dwelling on what I could have done differently, I remind myself that finding the middle ground also means acknowledging that I won't always have a clear definition of what is "right." We're all human, and we all have the right to seek and discover our own middle ground.
Krystal A Phillips